Looking Back, Moving Forward: My Super Late New Year Reflection

Now that the slew of posts, status messages and tweets of new year’s resolutions, reflections of the past year and  hopes for the current one are over, I figured it is high time, and hopefully not too late (doesn’t really matter) to make my own.

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The inspiration to write this came while reading a friend’s blog. I am impressed with how she found a renewed faith and is still able to maintain that corky, eccentric side of her that we, her friends, all knew so well and loved. Her blog tackles a chapter in the bible about memorial stones as a testament of God’s blessings and how we can use them to model the future by looking into the past. Here are a few lines from that article.

In Joshua chapter 4, the twelve Israelites led by Joshua miraculously passed the Jordan river when God dried it up, and commanded for them to take 12 stones from the bottom of the river as a memorial of this favor from Him. It was a physical testament that would show other people of what God had done, and what else He is capable of doing.

She concludes by asking…

What are the stones in your life you have picked up this year? How can you use it to look back at God’s past faithfulness in your life, and get you ready for the future?

I have to admit, I’m no devout. Far from it. That said, this blog will not contain stories of me making the convert; I do not see myself ready for such commitment. Not yet. But that question really got me thinking. This is my response.

Family. Last Christmas my brother decided to give our parents one of those over sized cards. Being a self-confessed introvert, I didn’t mind pouring my heart out on the message I wrote, thinking that this will be read by my parents in private. Lo and behold, on Christmas day, my brother announced that we read our messages aloud. In front of everyone! This was such a huge step outside of my comfort zone; a step worth taking as I watch my parents turn misty-eyed as we recite our messages.

Friends. I regretfully and shamefully admit that I haven’t been able to maintain constant communication with a few friends. Several factors come to mind why this is the case; perhaps it’s distance, schedule, change in priorities or difference in interests. The aforementioned are not meant to justify my behavior.

Love. My life is made more colorful by my “little bundle of joy” of a pet. And healthier too, she is the main reason why I take daily walks, the only exercise I have in my sedentary, work-from-home lifestyle.

Career. If personally reading my heart-felt message to my parents is a step outside of my comfort zone, resigning (immediate at that) from work, without a full-proof plan B in place,  is a leap.

Sure I’ve got a degree and a license as a professional health care provider, but my knowledge (not to mention my age) is no longer at its prime to consider going back in practice. Also, those many years spent in the call center industry not only made me jaded, it left other job’s paycheck less to be desired.

How many times have you heard people say, “You can’t have it all.”? Twenty-twelve, generally, was a not-so-rough sea to sail. I have a great network of family and friends. The only thing that made me miserable was work; like a storm I saw in the horizon but was too indifferent to neither steer away from, nor bother to find a way out while I was being hammered by its callous winds. Resigning holds one of the top spots as the best decision I made in 2012. It saved my sanity.

My mentor served as my guide out of the tempest; and now guides me (with much frustration)  in developing a new skill as a web developer/virtual assistant. I don’t always get the concept, often not at first try, but I am getting there. Definitely getting there. After so long, I am again enjoying the work I do. The better rate, less work hours, not needing to commute (not to mention getting stuck in traffic) daily and not having to deal with office-mates I don’t like are added incentives.

To my friends, I will make no excuses. There are none. There shouldn’t be. I acknowledge my shortcoming and will do better with keeping in touch.

To my family, who very likely doesn’t even know the existence of this blog, I cannot promise to be more vocal, but i will try when it matters.

When I look back, I usually only focus on specific memories and fail to see the bigger picture. Writing this entry definitely made me look back on how it ALL was and made me realize that last year wasn’t as miserable as I remember it to be. More importantly, I have a clearer notion of how my past experiences have opened new opportunities and how I can use them to best deal and shape what’s to come.

This post has gone longer than I intended, and I don’t very much like writing about reflections. Now I pass the question to you…

What are the stones in your life you have picked up last year? How can you use it to get you ready for the future?

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4 Responses to Looking Back, Moving Forward: My Super Late New Year Reflection

  1. JM Jenna Marie Alba 5 February 2013 at 6:59 pm #

    wow… i love this!…my fave so far..and with keeping in touch friend, i could definitely say wala kang shortcoming sakin!alam natin yan!haha..miss yah..mwaah… =)

    • Rainbow Journal 6 February 2013 at 9:15 am #

      Thanks friend! It felt like the article went on forever, nobody would really read it. Hahaha! See ya soon! Missing you too! Much!

    • Rainbow Journal 6 February 2013 at 9:22 am #

      Alam ko friend kung ano ang pinaka naka-relate ka! Ito: "…not having to deal with office-mates I don’t like…" Ahahahaha!

    • JM Jenna Marie Alba 6 February 2013 at 3:56 pm #

      haha.. PAK! miss you more friend!mwaah